he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
