Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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