Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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