I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize