kristin has been a bad kristin
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Couch. On fire.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
