How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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