insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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