Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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