hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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