This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
