butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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