well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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