covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.