All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
