Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
