I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
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Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
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I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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