u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize