Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
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but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
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Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship