There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Are my feet made of real feet?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
