Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Crop dusting thru forever 21
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
