Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize