i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
