I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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