im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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