i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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