It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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