Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize