her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize