Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Ambien. No doubt about it.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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