I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
