Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
