I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
