i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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