it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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