I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
