This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
