So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
