My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
