he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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