I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
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