areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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