Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize