I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
