I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize