Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.