We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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