Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize