Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I need to stop coming to work sober
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize
