Nicole vs. Life
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Randomize
