make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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