Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
